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Three humorous items for a soggy, soon to be snowy, Wednesday morning. |
First up, Classic Liberal says this Obama “Taxman” video is awesome and needs to go viral. I agree!
My friend Mike sent me this picture last night.
And another friend forwarded this one a while back.
When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.
by Chris WysockiRead more at wyblog.us
Samuel sent this one in
One of the best marksmen in the FBI was passing through a small town
Everywhere he saw evidence of the most amazing shooting. On trees, on walls, and on fences there were numerous bull’s-eyes with the bullet hole in dead center.
The FBI agent asked one of the townspeople if he could meet the person responsible for this wonderful marksmanship. No problem. The marksman turned out to also be the town drunk.
“This is the best marksmanship I have ever seen,” said the agent to the man. “How in the world do you do it?”
“Nothing to it,” said the wobbling man. “I shoot first and draw the circles afterward.” Read more at directorblue.blogspot.com
No dissenting members from any block member state could be reached for comment.
By Comrade Whoopie
http://bit.ly/81RXIM
A block of nations comprised solely of dictatorships and absolute monarchies has proposed a resolution to change the bylaws of the UN restricting democracies from voting. Said a spokesman for the group, “The international community believes in one man, one vote. Face it, we’re the only one-man governments here.” Should this be adopted they also propose the UN General Assembly be renamed the General’s Assembly.
The first order of business for the group is to streamline the UN process. The notoriously lengthy UN debates take too much time, often resulting in bad or inept decisions. The new process will bring the same results in one third of the time. A statement dictated to the press said, “Democracies are inefficient when making decisions. We can improve the UN by eliminating the inefficient. Hard decisions are only hard because people are given choices. Our way makes hard decisions easy.”
Yeah, we’re the murderers. Not Mugabe – who delighted in the torture, starvation and killing of his own people, for years.
This would all be hilarious if these creeps didn’t have our own leaders on their side. Witness secretary of State Hillary Clinton announcing that our country is ready to create an annual 0 billion climate protection fund to help ... read more
Every circus needs a clown, but sometimes it takes a clown to tell the truth.
And so we have Hugo Chavez, the pockmarked prince of all things petulant – paying a visit to the Climate Change conference to rousing, delirious applause. Check out the human sausage below.
In sum, Chavez is all about ending “imperial dictatorships,” and that “capitalism is the road to hell.” He says, “Let’s fight against capitalism and make it obey us.”
Anyway, according to the Herald Sun, all of this was greeted with a standing ovation. And Hugo deserves it – for he’s exposing this crap fest for what it is: a massive transfer of wealth from the west to scumbags like him.
But Chavez wasn’t the only one to lecture America on how evil we are. There was Zimbabwe President, Robert Mugabe, who noted that as “these capitalist gods of carbon…belch their dangerous emissions,” it’s “the lesser mortals of the developing sphere” who die.Read more at bighollywood.breitbart.com
But, Your Honor, when she moved the fourth time and sat under a sign that said, ‘Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this Accident’…. I just lost it.’
‘CASE DISMISSED!!’
A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus. She noticed
the man opposite her was grinning at her.
She immediately moved to another seat. This time the grin turned into a smile, so she moved again. The man seemed more amused. When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing, she complained to the driver and he had the man arrested.
The case came up in court. The judge asked the man (about 20 years old) what he had to say for himself. The man replied,
‘Well your Honor, it was like this, when the lady got on the bus, I
couldn’t help but notice her condition.. She sat down under a signthat said, ‘The Double Mint Twins are coming’ and I grinned.
Then she moved and sat under a sign that said, ‘ Logan’s Liniment
will reduce the swelling,’ and I had to smile. Then she placed
herself under a deodorant sign that said, ‘William’s Big Stick Did
the Trick,’ and I could hardly contain myself.Read more at www.sodahead.com
You’ve got male!’
